August 28, 2008

Questions I've been asked

I've been asked a couple of questions several times and thought that I would answer them here.

1) Is he missing his mom and dad? Yes, the other night he was sitting on his bed at bedtime and was kissing the pictures of his mom and dad (from the photobook they gave us) The hard part is that I can't communicate with him about it. I try and I just hope he understands at some part what I am saying. I ended up just sitting on the bed with him while he looked through the photobook and told me who everyone was. (we've done this many times)

2) Do you plan to keep in touch with his parents? Yes, we do. They love him dearly and want them to know that he is doing good and loved. We have their address and plan to send pictures and letters from us.

3) How is he adjusting? On the outside well. But it is hard to tell really how he is feeling. He is smiling and laughing but that doesn't always tell you alot (how many times do we put on a smile when we really don't feel it?) Alot of times the grieving for the loss may not happen until months down the road..and attachment issues may not fully be seen until later on also...that is why we may seem a little 'over the top' on some of the things...but we have been advised by people who have been there to take attachment very seriously. I'd rather go the extra mile now rather than wish I had later.

4)How are the other children doing? They are all doing well...There have been adjustments and some learning to share and learning to be patient and have compassion and seeing things through someone else's eyes (for the kids and mom and dad!) And I am sure we will have alot more to learn in all of those areas.

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